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Jan Denise, author, speaker, relationships & self-worth consultant

Love has no agenda …

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Shhhhh

You can hear more in a moment of silence than in a lifetime of noise.… More

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This IS the reward!

If I don’t find reward in the process of doing what I’m doing, regardless of where the relationship is going, I better do something else–or do it with somebody else! … More

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Love Yourself to a Healthy Weight, TIP SIX

Is weight standing between you and the relationship of your dreams? Reaching a healthy weight is part of loving yourself well.

TIP SIX: When you exercise, do it in a feel good spot! You’ll be more apt to do it!

PRACTICE: It’s important that you exercise consistently. And part of that is choosing a spot that feels good to you! If you love to be outside, choose an activity you can easily do outside, maybe in your favorite park. If you prefer to be inside, choose a space you love to be in–whether it’s looking out a window or at a piece of art that speaks to you. Play music, light candles, have a bath ready … whatever feels nurturing! Indulge yourself.

You CAN do this! You can LOVE yourself to a healthy weight!… More

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Frog, Toad, or Prince?

You can’t really turn a frog into a prince. But you can mistake a prince for a frog! In fact, everybody is somebody’s prince! Don’t pass yours up because he doesn’t wear a crown. Some men have yet to realize their royal blood. You can’t do it for them; but you may want to offer them a kiss, without getting too attached. Others don’t strut their crown; because they have nothing to prove. Try to see past the green and the crown to what’s inside. What matters can’t be seen or touched. Don’t be fooled, though; as within, so without. Look for evidence of love!

~ Is he healthy and well groomed?
~ Is his home well cared for?
~ Is his mind nurtured by the truth?
~ Is his spirit free?

Every frog is awfully cute in his own right. Find one (male or female) that feels like going home, home to love.

Happy kissing!… More

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Are You Trapped in Your Comfort Zone?

The challenge is not to know the truth, but to face the truth. The truth is like love. It’s always there! But FACING it often means facing what we’ve worked hard to mask. You know that almost-apology you sometimes offer–or get–“I’m sorry IF I was wrong”? It’s a perfect example of bypassing the truth, while easing the conscience just enough to stay comfortable. If you have an image of yourself as kind, you may not want to admit to a sweetheart (or anybody else) that you were, in fact, unkind. Ugh, then you’d have to look at the anger and resentment that triggered your unkind behavior. You’d have to admit that you ARE angry and resentful. And delving into “why” feels like way too much work and way too much confession! It’s the REASON for your anger and resentment that you’ve worked so hard to cover up.

You’re angry because … You resent your partner, your job, your weight, or whatever because … For now an almost-apology tempered by some blame or an excuse keeps you in your comfort zone and maintains your self-image. Ah, but it also keeps you trapped in your own little prison.

You want to be free.… More

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Love Yourself to a Healthy Weight: TIP FIVE

TIP FIVE: Cut the size of your bites in half; and you can eat twice as many!

PRACTICE: You might take bite-size for granted; but think about it and take advantage of your next chance to watch people eat. Some people fit three of your bites into one. Others may divide one of your bites into three! Just start by consciously putting half as much food on your fork. And continue to savor each bite and swallow it before you go for another bite (Tip One). Form a habit. THEN, if you want to vary the size of your bites, go ahead. But do it consciously.

You CAN do this! You can LOVE yourself to a healthy weight!… More

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Learning to Love Yourself

Jan's program for the quest of a lifetime.

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~ Who you are, apart from the facade
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