Jan's New Book

Sex...why we can't get enough, until we come home to love
There isn't enough sex to satisfy our need for love. But we keep trying to make it enough; because infatuation and orgasm do open a window into love. We involuntarily drop our boundaries and connect with somebody.

Somebody gets us! And that's the love we want ... but the boundaries automatically go up again. We're left wanting. And we Band-aid our dissonance, until it drives us to heal our wounds. Then we can share our nakedness as the best of who we are, to know authentic love--with sex as a byproduct, rather than a substitute. Other Books Available Now

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Jan’s Latest Post

Are your heart and mind working together?

You CAN get what you want in life. And part of that is learning to align your desires, your intentions, and your beliefs.

When we have a desire, we want something. When we have an intention, we intend to have what we want. And when we intend to have it, we live life as though we will have it. If we only want something, we may intend to go on wanting it indefinitely. We may go through the motions of doing something about our desire only to relieve our sense of obligation to do something, with no real intention of ever satisfying our desire.

If we want something and we don’t intend to have it, chances are we have conflicting desires or limiting beliefs.

Maybe you want to lose ten pounds and you also want to continue to eat as much as you’re eating now. Hmmm … looking honestly at both of your desires allows you to see an option you may have missed. And the option to burn more calories — rather than eat fewer calories — may spur an intention.

Maybe you want to get along with your sweetheart and you also want to make him see how wrong he is.… More

Have You Learned to Love Unconditionally?

When I have learned to love myself, I can truly love another, without using him to meet my own needs. When I have faced my own open wounds and my own scars, and known both “weakness” and strength side-by-side in me, I can love another completely and unconditionally, without judging him. … More