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Find "The One," or I'll Refund Your Money!

And I’ve never been so excited about any program, ever!

I know the science, the art, and the spirit of love more than I ever have … and I’m more certain than I’ve ever been of what it takes for you to live your fairytale. Don’t get soft on me, though; the fairytale is a pilgrimage to love. And while I will guide you to the sunrise of a new beginning, you have to follow my lead.

You don’t have to invite me to the wedding … but you could invite me to perform the ceremony!

What makes me so bold now? Click to Read More

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Jan’s Latest Post

Slow down the clock!

We can’t stop the aging process; but we can slow it down … and appreciate the blessing of time.

A few wrinkles (OK, eventually, a lot of wrinkles) are a small price to pay for what matters on the other side of what doesn’t. Seems we have to learn for ourselves that money can’t buy love and that we can’t really love others until we’ve learned to love ourselves.

That’s big! No wonder we’re half way through our lives (if we learn fast) before we get it. The good news is that we’re now living about 78 years — 30 years longer than we did at the turn of the century. The better news is that we’re also learning how to improve the quality of that extra 30 years.

You can treat your body like the temple it is. And you don’t have to make a full time job of it; you do have to develop a healthy lifestyle and stick with it.

First, the obvious: If you smoke, stop. Smoking is the No. 1 cause of preventable death in this country. If you’re overweight, eat less. Obesity (or weight-related disease) comes in second.

And as part of a weight-loss program (there’s a two out of three chance you need one), you can exercise, vigorously.… More

FWB: Friends with Benefits, OR Blinders

I just explained to my husband that “friends with benefits” refers to friends who have sex. But in a study, college students needed no explanation; 60 percent of those surveyed have had this type of relationship.

Sex, the thing that traditionally distinguished a friendship from a romantic relationship, is now up for grabs.

And I’m getting e-mails from those who want to know how they can participate … not just how to find a willing friend, but how to turn sex into something they can do with a friend. One woman went so far as to tell me, after reading John Gray’s advice column, that she must not be normal.

Do we really want to engage in sex the way we watch a movie or eat takeout with friends? Let’s not mindlessly jump on the bandwagon — and even if we decide FWB falls within the normal range, let’s not make it our goal.

My first invitation to engage in FWB came from a close friend about 20 years ago, long before all the press. There was too much mutual respect for me to be offended, but I was curious. Why would we do that?

He explained that having sex with each other would take the pressure off and allow us to take our time in finding a romantic relationship and incorporating sex … smart, resourceful guy, loyal friend.… More