What will you discover by telling your story?

I tossed my little bunny to the man in the third row. He reached out and caught her with one hand and, while caressing her, whispered in her ear. With a nonthreatening listener in hand, he had something to say.

We all have a story to tell, a story to live.

We write the story while growing up and observing how life plays out and how we would like for life to play out. Many of the scenes center on relationships. Ultimately, we want to feel known and loved; we want to love. We are designed to love.

Everybody writes a different story, though, paints a different picture of what love looks like. It is important to look at your own story — and share it. And, it is important to listen to your partner’s.

Storytelling is an art…and in order to keep it alive, we have to practice it. Can you imagine what your life would be like without stories? We cannot afford to leave the storytelling to somebody else.

Telling our own story puts us face-to-face with our fears and dreams and the characters that play a role in them. It gives us an opportunity to revise immature thinking and to make sure the story is healthy and loving. It gives us our best shot at LIVING the story we want to live.

It is easier to click the remote or the mouse and be entertained. But imagine sitting down with your sweetheart and telling her a story…a story that’s bound to reflect what you are thinking and feeling both consciously and unconsciously. Imagine how much you could learn about your sweetie by asking her to finish the story, or start her own.

You are partners in life, and your life together is a collaboration. Sometimes it seems more like a nonsensical play unfolding without YOU. But that’s because we tend to let life happen while we busy ourselves with distractions.

Stories bring to the surface what you truly want — what you can do with your whole heart. They can be a tool to understand yourself better and share your insides with your partner. Maybe your sweetheart doesn’t know that flowers mean romance in your story; maybe in his story music means romance. If you want to feel romantic at the same time, bring flowers and music together. Combine your stories!

You might not think to mention that you want affection in public OR you might be embarrassed to mention it. In telling a story, it just comes out. It’s like having a little dummy on your lap that you can talk through. You can make him say anything — about that upcoming move or job or vacation or dinner.

You might be surprised at what he spouts off — dreams you’d forgotten and secrets you’d tucked away. It’s all there in your unconscious, and bringing it into your consciousness is a chance to process it and resolve conflicts that cause unrest. Maybe you’re still pining for a lost love, only because you didn’t finish the story…yet, you outgrew him years back.

Storytelling is about values and trust and healing. It’s about touching and whispering and sharing. It’s about a soft voice, a harsh feeling, a knowing smile. It’s about disclosure, knowing and sharing yourself and each other in a nonthreatening way. It’s also about knowing and sharing more comfortably even without a story!

So, start with a bunny or a doll, and tell a story. You just might be amazed at how much your partner has to say — and how fun and meaningful it is to listen. You just might be amazed at how much living you have to do!