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We learn to set boundaries, right? Yay! But we must also learn to use them honestly. A boundary can be motivated by love or fear. We want to make sure that OURS are motivated by love.

Otherwise, it’s easy to use a boundary as an excuse to be lazy, rather than face the truth. Facing the truth is work; it requires courage and discipline, when we’d rather look the other way, and blame the other guy.

So, next time you decline an invitation or opt not to demonstrate your love, look honestly at why. And don’t be afraid to say, “Ouch.” Facing the truth is the tough part. Once you have faced the truth, you will be compelled to act on it.

Love smiles on you,… More

We all have “deal breakers,” but we don’t all talk about them — or even think about them.

Hey, if we acknowledge them, especially out loud, then we look foolish ignoring them. And sometimes that’s exactly what we prefer to do. It’s tough enough to strike a deal with somebody, right? You might not give much thought to what makes it, let alone what could break it.

But what if denying key elements of what we want is largely responsible for our trying to make something else work and missing out on our bliss?

When you disregard your deal breakers, you disrespect yourself (and somebody else). It feels better than sitting on the sidelines … but only until your relationship tumbles down, yanking all your hopes of happily-ever-after.

“It hurts, but I knew from the beginning there was something missing — I couldn’t see any passion in his eyes … I just had to gather the courage to accept that it couldn’t really work, I NEED passion,” says one client.

Whenever you find the courage to face the truth, be thankful. And communicate it.

“Everyone has ‘deal breakers,’ says Dr. Ava Cadell, founder of the Loveology University and creator of the Mutual Love Agreement, or MLA, “and the only problem with those deal breakers is when both people in a relationship are not aware of them.”… More