Love has no agenda …

You can’t pull your parachute cord without jumping.
And you can’t exercise your faith without leaping.

Take the leap! … More

You CAN get what you want in life. And part of that is learning to align your desires, your intentions, and your beliefs.

When we have a desire, we want something. When we have an intention, we intend to have what we want. And when we intend to have it, we live life as though we will have it. If we only want something, we may intend to go on wanting it indefinitely. We may go through the motions of doing something about our desire only to relieve our sense of obligation to do something, with no real intention of ever satisfying our desire.

If we want something and we don’t intend to have it, chances are we have conflicting desires or limiting beliefs.

Maybe you want to lose ten pounds and you also want to continue to eat as much as you’re eating now. Hmmm … looking honestly at both of your desires allows you to see an option you may have missed. And the option to burn more calories — rather than eat fewer calories — may spur an intention.

Maybe you want to get along with your sweetheart and you also want to make him see how wrong he is.… More

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Dating can be like a box of chocolates — you never know what you’re gonna get (borrowing from the movie “Forest Gump”).

Even when we’ve taken great care to screen the chocolates, we can be surprised. The good news is — all the chocolates have something to offer us! There are no “bad” chocolates! You knew that!

There are no “bad” dates, either. They all have something to teach us, something we have to learn to get to the happily ever after.

Let’s get on with it! … More

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Years ago, while I was dating a psychiatrist, he told me that I was too often disappointed with him. I was goo-gah over his brain, and he melted me — and everybody else — when he smiled. He saw through people and felt warm toward them; and they knew it. Disappointed in him? Not this girl.

Bless my insecure little 30-year-old heart, though, I acted like I was. Because I felt inferior, I tried not to act intimidated or overly impressed. I was bold in expressing my insight into his issues; he was receptive — not defensive.

When he told me that our issues were clashing, I thought it was mostly about my not feeding his ego. I thought that was a good thing. Without realizing it, though, I continued to feed my own ego and want him to feed it.

Truth is, I wanted desperately to feel good enough for him!

Now I realize that he probably saw through my defensiveness, and understood his own need for reinforcement. He still wanted somebody who was impressed by him. I was — the condo, the car, the Yale degree — but I was unable to express that freely. I was too self-conscious about what I saw as my own shortcomings to ignore what I saw as his shortcomings and underscore his long list of strengths.… More